Who to bring to the delivery room?

Post date: 2021-01-16 06:23:32

Am I being unreasonable by choosing my mom over my ex to be there with me when I deliver my son?

I split up with ex last summer. We have a 2 year old and one on the way who will be due in a week or 2. We've been coparenting mostly amicably, with some bumps here and there.

I'm glad we're not together anymore and think its for the best. We argued a lot towards the end our relationship was stressful and exacerbated my depression. My ex wasn't happy at the end either but would still like to get back together for the sake of being a family. I don't want to get back together and just want to coparent with minimal contact. It hasn't even been 6 months yet and I just want space as I try work through and get past hurt feelings and such.

That said, I was planning on having my mom stay with me at the hospital when I delivered. Due to COVID, only 1 support person is allowed. When our son was born I felt like ex spent to much time complaining about the bed, food, lack of sleep etc.

Plus, being with him for 2-4 days straight seems stressful and were bound to argue at least once. Most likely because he refuses to give our kids his last name. He insist on trying pass on his mother's maiden name, saying that its his real last name even he doesnt go by it, have on any documents or introduce himself with it. This has been a real point of contention for us because when our son was born he said he'd change his name to his mothers maiden name of we gave it to son and then changed his mind and refused afterwards saying he didn't need to justify his name to me. Our son now has a hyphenated last name. Mine, which I go by and his grandmother's maiden name which confuses people as to his parentage. I think the whole thing is weird and it drives me crazy that he backed ales. This time around the baby is just getting my last name which is bound to cause a fight and not something I'm in the mood to deal with the hospital.

That said, I can understand him wanting to be there for the birth of our son. I'm a bit torn and not sure if my biases are making this more difficult. I'm not opposed to him being there but I am opposed to being stuck together for days and fighting. Once he's there he can't leave. After the baby is born, he'd be able come back to my house - the kids live with me full-time - and spend as much time as he wants with the kids. I currently have a high-risk pregnancy and just don't want any more stress. That said, am I being unreasonable?

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