Grandboss doesn't like me because I'm quiet, now what?

Post date: 2024-04-26 09:23:15

Today, quite out of the blue, my grandboss strongly implied that he didn't like my personality. I have to work in close proximity with this dude on the regular. How to proceed?

I've worked in my role for around four years and have never gotten anything but outstanding reviews on my work, including my personality. Stuff like "pleasant", "professional", and "intelligent". In fact, I recently received a substantial raise that he presumably signed off on and an offer for a promotion in the nearish future that I am still thinking on.

A little over a year ago, I moved locations to a desk just outside the grandboss's office door. Grandboss has never been overly warm or friendly but he's not rude (up until now) or abusive either and we are basically polite and cordial to each other. He's basically shown zero interest in me as a person so I naturally took that as a cue that he didn't want to get to know each other any better. Fine by me, "Good morning", "how are you?" plus some other technicalities related to actual work are about the extent of it.

All of the sudden, today, he comes out of his office and says "Howdy!" rather loudly. I say "Hello" and then he asks me why I don't ever say anything. I feel put on the spot so I just chuckle nervously. He then proceeds to start a conversation with the only other coworker in our space about how he had really liked a former employee who used to sit where I do now because she was "bubbly".

I found this pretty rude and weird. I'm an introvert for sure but I'm also pretty friendly to people who are friendly to me. My social skills are pretty okay. In fact, I have a nice "work friend" relationship with the third coworker I'm referencing, and I doubt she finds my personality lacking. Grandboss himself comes across as quite a bit more reserved and socially awkward than I would consider myself to be.

What's more, he has a long established rapport with the other coworker in the office and WILL engage her in friendly conversations and she him. In the past, when I've tried to join in on these casual conversations that were happening right in front of me, my contributions were ignored by him, so I just stopped making them.

He absolutely has the power to fire me on the spot, so I'd rather not misstep too far but putting on a big chipper act and trying to start conversations with someone who clearly isn't interested in having conversations with me strikes me as unbearably undignified. I literally don't think I can do it. I get the feeling he wants me to be some kind of clone of my other coworker or the aforementioned former employee who I never even met. Obviously, I can't do that either, so how am I supposed to act around this guy now?

P.S. Don't worry, I'm looking for another job - just don't want to lose the one I have prematurely.

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