How to have a "living here means working or going to school" convo ?

Post date: 2024-03-23 01:09:19

You've had a productive/successful conversation with a young adult in your family, who is resistant to returning to school or work. How did you manage that? What tips do you have?

The young adult is almost 20 and has completed one year of university. They have been out of school for about a year, and worked a few months during this time. They would prefer not to work, and not to attend school. They have a therapist (their choice, parents pay), and are not currently being treated for depression. They enjoy leisure. They contribute minimally to household tasks, and only when specifically asked.

Made possible via savings of the parents, this child has been offered the option to attend the university/college of their choice anywhere in the country (or internationally, if equivalent cost), taking the program of their choice, fully funded including residence and associated expenses. Spending money to come from their own earnings. This has been positioned as offering the child the chance to choose their own career/direction.

Parents in this scenario took on substantial debt to complete their own education and have solid careers after years of slogging. They lives are heavily work focused, currently aimed at saving for retirement, and they work mostly from home.

We the parents, are set in our belief that 'work or school' are reasonably requirements for adults living in this home, and understand the child choosing to live with other family may be an outcome of this conversation.

How did you handle this conversation

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