After years of putting it off, I made an appointment to see a doctor about my anxiety this week. What should I say to the doctor? What is it like to see a doctor for anxiety? More questions inside.
I had a bit of an aborted attempted to get my anxiety treated last winter. I had an initial appointment with this same doctor, got some blood work done, but due to my mother's health issues/moving to a new city/the pandemic/anxiety... I put it off.
After having some unbearable anxiety since Wednesday, I decided to make an appointment with the same doctor to continue where we left off.
What exactly do I tell a doctor about my anxiety? I've always had some sort of general/social anxiety. It's permeated every area of my life since I've been in my mid-teens. I've been getting more anxiety spirals lately about, honestly, stupid things.
For example, what set off this week's anxiety spiral is waiting for a reply from our accountant about doing my mothers' & my taxes this year. I sent him an email on Wednesday and he hasn't replied yet, so naturally my anxiety brain is working overtime thinking that my accountant is ghosting us! Then I get anxious about finding another accountant, or doing our taxes myself... like, LOGICALLY, I know that both of those options are pretty simple. LOGICALLY, I know that he'll probably reply! But I've been having awful anxiety about this, it's ridiculous. My body feels tense, I'm irritable, I've barely had an appetite, etc. (It's better than it was on Wednesday, but still.)
I'm in therapy and I feel like it's been very helpful, but I think that medication of some sort is necessary. I can only get "so far" without it.
But then it scares me to imagine being on medication FOREVER. Can I also ask for a referral to see a psychiatrist? It worries me to have psych meds managed by a GP, due to their training. A psychiatrist would surely know more about managing medications for depression/anxiety than a GP. I'm in Canada, so I have no idea how this works.
I feel dumb seeing a doctor about anxiety because, deep down, I worry that they wouldn't be able to understand the effects that this has been having on my life. Doctors have to be able to push through so much shit to become a doctor... how could they understand the ridiculous amount of anxiety I'm having about stupid shit like an accountant emailing me back?! I'm afraid that they'll be unsympathetic. What do I tell them? I feel so embarrassed. |
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