I suffer from insomnia and I'm three weeks into self-directed CBT-I and sleep restriction. I'm feeling awful and unsuccessful, and I could use some help from those who tried them.
Hi all, you've all been incredibly helpful to me in the past and I'm hoping you can help me solve this one pesky, persistent issue. I've been struggling with insomnia for about 3.5 years -- I never have trouble falling asleep, but I have significant problems with middle of the night awakenings, waking up too early, and not sleeping very deeply. This was due to a combination of factors, like being at the mercy of other people's schedules (roommates with inconsistent sleep schedules, living in a living room and being exposed to ALL my housemates' schedules which varied across the board, and living with my partner, a resident physician, in a studio apartment who has downright unpredictable hours... think waking up at 4am somedays, 6am on other days, 11am on days where they have call, and etc.). I coped with my sleep deprivation in maladaptive ways that I now know made my insomnia worse and more entrenched, like allocating more time in bed for sleep, laying in bed during the daytime to browse the internet because I was so tired, and having caffeinated drinks at all hours of the day.
Otherwise, my life is going incredibly well. I am mentally and physically healthy, have a good job with great benefits, and am surrounded by healthy social circles that bolster me up. I also have my own quiet bedroom that I do not share with anybody, so it's an ideal time to fix my insomnia. I read Say Goodnight to Insomnia and decided to follow their self-directed CBT-I program. I downloaded the CBT-i Coach app to help me track my sleep.
I learned about sleep hygiene, stopped my maladaptive behaviors, and aside from sticking to the same wake and sleep time, my sleep hygiene is impeccable (think no screens an hr before bed, no caffeine after 12, having wind down activities before bed, journaling my sleep anxieties, using the bed only for sleep and sex, and etc.) I also avoid all sleep medications because they haven't been helpful.
It's been about 2 weeks and 3 days and I'm feeling frustrated at a lack of progress. My average time in bed is 6.2 hours and average time asleep is 4.8. My average sleep efficiency is 77.1%. I feel like dying is an understatement.
Here is a brief overview of what happened:
Week 1 -- I dedicated this week as an observation period. I set my bedtime to 10:50pm and wake time to 6am because I don't need that much sleep on a good night -- maybe 7 or 7.5 is ideal. I cycled from sleeping approximately 6.5 hours, to 3.5 the next night, then 5, to 6 again, 3, and 7. Lots of middle of the night awakenings and waking up too early feeling wired and ready to start the day, yet having significant daytime fatigue later on.
With middle of the night awakenings, there is a 50/50 chance I'll fall back asleep after being awake for 1.5-2 hrs. Otherwise, I'll get up and start my day early.
Week 2 -- This was a mess. Daylight savings really screwed me up. I tried to "keep" the same schedule by setting my bedtime to 11:50pm and wake time to 7am, and for three days I strung together 6-7 hours of sleep. It was amazing. However, I really wanted to wake up at 6am so I could have extra time for myself before going to work so I adjusted my sleep back to 10:50pm - 6am again. I had 4 hours of sleep, then 6 hours the next night. I was so desperate and exhausted, I decided to restrict my sleep on the sixth night to 11:50pm-6am (my average hours asleep up until this point + 1 hr). I strung together two nights with 4 hours of sleep.
I noticed my dog was waking me up two nights out of the week, so I trained her to sleep in the living room. She's doing well there. The other early awakenings was due to my usual middle of the night awakenings.
My room was also too warm so I turned on a fan.
I also experimented with napping on one of those days. To no one's surprise, I had trouble falling asleep so napping is out.
Although my sleep was deeper this week, I wasn't wired anymore. I wanted to drop dead from exhaustion, especially when I first wake up in the morning and on the run-up to bedtime.
Week 3 -- I'm only three nights in and I'm doing poorly. I'm sticking to my 11:50pm-6am sleep schedule, although sometimes I sleep at 11:40pm because I cannot stand the exhaustion. I'm really good at waking up at 6am though. I slept 5 hrs and 41 mins on the first night, then 5 hrs and 30 mins on the second nights. On both nights I woke up in the middle of the night but was able to fall back asleep in 20 mins because I exercised during the day. Last night I only had 3 hrs and 50 mins of sleep because I didn't exercise and wasn't feeling sleepy enough to fall back asleep. I'm TIRED though, but for the life of me I CANNOT SLEEP.
I'm not feeling wired and optimistic anymore. I'm beyond frustrated and hopeless. At least now I've isolated external factors that were keeping me up and I'm now dealing with the insomnia directly, but I'm feeling too tired to stick this through. I just want to lay in bed all day, nap, or turn off my alarm to sleep in after a poor night's sleep. I want to have a mental breakdown and reduce to a sobbing mess. But I can't, I'm not ready to give up yet.
I guess the purpose of this post was to vent a little, but most importantly I want to hear from those who tried CBT-I and sleep restriction. Was it successful? Did you have a terrible time at the start? How long did it take to work? I'm also wondering if I am doing this right, but I want to give it two more weeks before consulting a CBT-I provider. Thanks for your help in advance. |
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