On skin, sex, and teenage girls

Post date: 2018-09-18 06:34:53
Views: 371
My teen daughters looks good in, and like to wear, revealing clothing. Help me guide them and figure out my own feelings about this.

Apologies if this is a bit scattered; I'm not sure how I feel about this stuff and need help first educating myself and then guiding my two teen daughters.

Me: early 40s, single mother, raised in a conservative but not extreme Muslim-Canadian household. I'm considered conventionally attractive with a nice figure. I generally dress to accentuate it but am uncomfortable/shy about showing too much cleavage. I think this has to do with being teased about my DD breasts as an adolescent plus not being allowed to show much skin growing up. I was allowed to wear t-shirts and Bermuda shorts, for example, but not tank tops or regular-length shorts. So that's the baggage I bring to this.

I'm no longer religious and religion has zero bearing on my values/decisions.

Daughters: 15 and 14; one is shaped like me (curvy, large breasted), the other is very petite, small breasted. They both look good in...well, everything. And they are pretty comfortable in everything. Especially the curvy one.

I feel like, on the one hand, they dress like tons of other girls their age - short shorts, tight jeans, crop tops, tank tops. Pretty bralettes peeking out. Etc. On the other hand...I don't love seeing so much of their skin sometimes. And I need help figuring out why. Is it because I was raised upright? Is it because I worry about them being objectified? WILL they be objectified/harmed by this? How much cleavage is it ok for a 15 year old to show - and why? I consider myself a feminist but a really ignorant one. Help me learn. I want to raise strong, confident women who dress proudly but also appropriately. Also, because I have two daughters with two different body types, I want to be careful about my rules (something that looks "harmless" on one daughter can easily be described as "too sexy" on the other - but that seems unfair - right?).

Lots for me to learn and think through. Help?
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