A friend asked me to dogsit her dog for a week while she went on vacation. I have dog-sat her before, without any issues at all. Unfortunately, this time around, the dog had a lot of issues, mainly not being able to hold their poop/pee. After everything had settled down, I sent a check-in text with this friend; ends up she's disappointed in me and does not want me to dog-sit her dog again. Feels she put her trust in me and feels let down. I'm not sure how to respond.
This friend, let's call her Dorothy, asked me to dogsit her dog (let's call her Lucy) for a week. I was initially a bit unsure because a week is a long time, but decided to accept, because I've sat for Lucy with no problems at all whatsoever before (including multiple night stays), and it would be nice to have the company. Dorothy promised me a dinner after she got back from vacation, gave me instructions on how to take care of Lucy, and had a backup in case things didn't work out. All good.
Upon getting Lucy, she didn't seem like herself. Separation anxiety, probably. She went pee a few times in my apartment—no big deal, but a bit odd given she never had that issue when I previously dog-sat her early this year. I continued to pay close attention to, and comfort, Lucy. Unfortunately, a couple of morning later, she went #2 (wet) on my carpet in the morning and didn't seem like herself, so I consulted a close friend of mine who was the designated vet-taker in case (has a vehicle) and got a lot of good advice. I upped the number of times I took her out, fed/gave her water regularly, and bought pads for my floor to absorb any potential further #2's. She didn't go toilet much, and seemed lethargic and sad—didn't accept treats I gave her.
Next morning, Lucy went #2 on my bed and on my floor, which provided to be just too much for me (it was wet, smelly, and nasty) — I felt in over my head. I had to clean everything up, and when I took her out, noticed some blood in her pee and on her bottom. I was alarmed. Reached out to Dorothy, and told her honestly that I felt in over my head and the frequent accidents were becoming too much for me, suggested maybe the backup be utilized. Lucy also seemed listless and down. Dorothy abruptly set up a pickup of Lucy to take Lucy back to her place, where she would be in a familiar environment. I continued to monitor her for further/extra blood, if any, and communicated with Dorothy.
I suspect (and the friend who I talked to) that because Dorothy and Lucy had moved twice this year, and was having abandonment fears (being moved to two completely new environments in one year is a lot, then having her owner leave on vacation). I felt so terrible—I felt like I failed at dog-sitting, and I felt bad because deep down, I felt like I let Dorothy down. She trusted me with Lucy. I did everything I could, though, was just in over my head. Just to be clear: I am not a dog owner (never have) so the issues I experienced was completely new to me.
Things didn't feel "right" between Dorothy and I since then. She did not seem too happy when that incident happened, but I chalked it up to her being worried about Lucy. So, I recently sent her a text to follow up and check in, to make sure things were okay with us, explained how terrible I felt about the situation, how I didn't want to let her down but really did feel in over my head, and was glad that Lucy was returned to a familiar environment. Dorothy responded and said she was disappointed — she felt she put a large amount of trust in me to take care of Lucy for a week, and that she felt she could not ask me to dog-sit Lucy again. She felt disappointed that I 'gave up' and that she thought I would be able to handle Lucy just fine.
I am not sure how to respond. First of all, I did dog-sit Lucy before without issues, and the expectation shared with me was that I would just have to take Lucy out maybe three times a day, feed her, give her medicine, and it'd be smooth/easy sailing. That's what I anticipated, but it was evident there were issues, especially with bladder control. The apartment I live in is expensive, and replacement carpet (if it grew to be that bad) isn't funny, and I really did my part by upping the number of times I took Lucy out (every 2-3 hours) to no avail. Finally, she had a backup assigned, which is what happened.
Dorothy's feelings of disappointment are valid, but I do feel she kind of dismissed my feelings/thoughts in the process. Not wanting to appear petty or transactional, but she didn't even offer to reimburse me for the pads/carpet cleaner and didn't offer the dinner she promised me. I went through a lot of hell and back to try and help Lucy, a lot of stress and cleaning, for four days, and I kind of feel it was all for nothing.
I'm not sure if I sound unreasonable or like the bad guy here; if I do, my apologies in advance. I am a reasonable person who tried and tried, but it didn't work out. I just feel like maybe I deserve better treatment from Dorothy? I'm not expecting reimbursement for the items at all, but it would be nice if she at least appreciated what I did do more, you know?
I am not sure how to respond to Dorothy. Any thoughts, perspectives (from different sides too, of course!) is fine.
Thanks. |
Video
Web
Image
Music
BlogU
